Welcome to Declassified, a weekly humor column.
I think we can all agree that “thunderbolt and lightning, very, very frightening me/Galileo (Galileo)/Galileo (Galileo)/ Galileo, Figaro, Magnifico” is the tribute that the late Queen Elizabeth II would have wanted.
So hats off to Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau, who was filmed giving a rousing rendition of Queen’s “Bohemian Rhapsody” in a London bar two days before the other queen’s funeral.
Reactions were mixed, with some people saying such behavior was unbecoming of a prime minister and members of his team pointing out it was just a man doing some singing. Whatever you think of Trudeau having the temerity to sing during a time of mourning in another country, he has done worse. Way worse.
The final word should go to music journalist Adam Feibel, who tweeted: “I don’t think that Justin Trudeau singing Bohemian Rhapsody was disrespectful to the queen but I know enough about karaoke to assume it was disrespectful to Queen.” Ouch!
One thing is (probably) for certain, though: Trudeau is a better singer than Donald Trump. This week there have been fresh reports of the golfer and occasional ex-president spinning a few tunes down at his Mar-a-Lago resort, with a particular favorite being “YMCA” by the Village People. The band have long been angry at Trump’s use of their song, putting out a statement after he left office that read: “We have no ill will towards the president, but we asked him to cease and desist long ago. However, since he’s a bully, our request was ignored.”
Of course with this being Trump, him DJing some gay anthems isn’t the oddest story he’s been involved with of late. That would be claims that he wanted to trade Puerto Rico for Greenland.
It was back in 2019 when we first heard reports that Trump wanted to buy the autonomous Danish territory — “We’re open for business, not for sale,” tweeted Greenland’s Ministry of Foreign Affairs at the time.
Now a new book claims that Trump told John Bolton, his national security adviser: “A friend of mine, a really, really experienced businessman, thinks we can get Greenland. What do you think?” He also considered “taking federal money from Puerto Rico” to fund the deal and then “suggested outright trading Puerto Rico for Greenland.”
Yes that’s clearly a batshit crazy idea but think of the benefits for both sides. The U.S. would have had a greater foothold in the Arctic — and a place for a new Trump Tower and Resort — and the people of Denmark would have had somewhere warm to go on holiday.
“Me? Just a regular guy out for a walk in London.”
Can you do better? Email [email protected] or on Twitter @pdallisonesque
Last time we gave you this photo:
Thanks for all the entries. Here’s the best from our postbag — there’s no prize except for the gift of laughter, which I think we can all agree is far more valuable than cash or booze.
“Left or right? Which one to choose?” by Agnes Servoz.
Paul Dallison is H10News.in‘s slot news editor.